Parents often feel guilty about their parenting. Perhaps you feel that too? Mums and dads often feel guilty about working long hours and not spending enough time with the kids, being short tempered and yelling a lot or feeling helpless when your children are having a hard time with friends or school. BUT, feeling guilty and stressed about parenting actually undermines your parenting. When you feel guilty and stressed you feel bad so you’re unlikely to come up with a great idea to resolve the issue and you’ll behave out of guilt or anger instead of love. So when you think about it like that you can see that feeling guilty is NOT what good parenting is about.
What can you do?
Research studies have shown that it is not about the quantity of time but the quality of time parents spend with their children that has the best outcomes. Instead of feeling guilty, can you:
make time to read with your young child which will support your child’s language development and inspire a love of learning.
go for a walk with your teenager, check in and ask how things are going. Then listen, listen, listen without offering advice, so you’re adolescent knows you’re interested and you’re there if they need support.
make a favourite meal and have one or more relaxed dinners together as a family with everyone having a turn to share their highlights of the day.
find a little time in the evening, like just before bed, that you can have some quiet time together with your child and tell them how much you love them.
It’s these short quality interactions with your child that makes for good parenting.